Wednesday, September 07, 2005

A target-rich environment

It's an embarassment of riches, really. Paralyzed by indecision, because there are so many good, snark-worthy items to rip the throat out of -- and I want to do a good job, to satisfy my DEMANDING READERS. Can I help it if I was off trying to ease the way for my (hopefully) emerging career as a writer this weekend, bravely holding forth at a convention on a dizzying array of subjects? [N.B. When in doubt, tell jokes. Audiences like jokes.]

In an interesting example of parallel evolution, the convention I attended (no, I will not name it because that would give you entirely too much information) was plagued, like Louisiana in general, by disorganization. Panels, panelists, timeslots, rooms -- all could morph or disappear without any notice. I am happy to report that there was no flooding and as far as I know nobody died, but the planning was described by a participant as reminiscent of tossed salad.

So too, Louisiana. Now we find out that they *did* have an evacuation plan, that might even have worked, but when the storm actually started their way they ... didn't use it. New Orleans officials were OFFERED food and supplies for the Dome of Last Resort, but they refused. They thought it would encourage people to go there. (Deep sigh, and hemorraging from the ears.) Wouldn't that be a good thing? Why on earth would you not want your people to be a) safe and b) fed? I don't blame a 90 year-old grandmother in a wheelchair for not evacuating, I suspect she would have if she could. But once you get her there, she will need water, and food, and probably some basic medical care. If you are going to neglect her to death maybe she'd prefer to die in her own home.

And that's just scratching the surface. I have some opinions on the subject of cops looting their own city, of intellectual midgets threatening to punish the young man who commandeered an abandoned bus and rescued everybody he could find, of a six-year old boy showing more discipline and concern for others than many adults. I especially want to spend some quality time with the flensing knives on the Mainstream Media, who can only see New Orleans (and maybe a five-mile radius surrounding). They mouth sonorous platitudes that all boil down to "We blame Bush", and act completely unaware that the hurricane was big enough to power-grind THREE states -- but only one is falling on its face. Gee. I guess being elected *doesn't* give you god-like powers. They don't give you the Book of Answers after the swearing-in. Nobody told Blanco she'd have to think. Or think quickly. (And may I just add -- thanks a bunch, honey, for setting back the women's rights movement ten years all by yer lonesome. Grow up, you pathetic spineless wonder. Or at least do the decent thing and resign.) And when are the moonbats going to figure out that you can't demand President Bush just brush aside the Constitution, posse comitatus, and the entire federal structure? That is, not with a straight face. Not after accusing him of being an imperialistic warmonger.

Europe? Yes you, the one with the sanctimonious sneer on your face. You have some homework. Get a map. Get a sheet of paper. Using the *safe* scissors, cut out an outline of the state of Louisiana. Now place that outline on the part of the map labeled "Europe". Does that give you a better idea of the scope of the problem? Now imagine there are no roads intact for heavy trucks, and no fuel if there *were* roads. Now imagine that because we *aren't* bloodthirsty heartless killers, we let criminals out of jails rather than leave them to drown. Yeah, its a mess. Thanks for letting us know.

(Still working on that Offend Everyone merit badge ...) I'm all for feeding the desperately hungry. I can even see helping people who have lost EVERYTHING but their lives start out again. But if you want to rebuild in exactly the same place in exactly the same way in New Orleans, I'm not donating a red cent for that.

Update: Go thou and read the written stilleto that is Sgt. Mom in action. She has such style with her cluebat! (And the crowd awards her two ears and the tail ...)
Other Update: fixed gratuitous mispelling of LA gov. name. Eh, right word, wrong language ...


Blogger John of Argghhh! said...

'Bout time!

4:43 AM, September 08, 2005  
Anonymous Beth Donovan said...

That is a great post, Snark Lady!!

5:19 AM, September 08, 2005  
Blogger Barb said...

Oooh, the knives are sharp and she *knows* how to use 'em.
Awesome take-down !!

6:24 AM, September 08, 2005  
Anonymous SangerM said...

Excellent!! Far more urbane and articulate than I've been lately. Very good job! Send a copy to every US senator! And to Shepherd Smith and Geraldo R who seem to think only New Orleans got whacked. I have a fried from Biloxi. His whole extended family is out of work, out of places to live, eat, shop, etc. Keesler AFB is going to be closed for a loooog time, not because it was destroyed but because there's nowhere for its employees to live! The Air Force has declared that base a "remote tour for the next 2 to 3 years." I hear NO will be open for business in a year.

7:30 PM, September 08, 2005  
Anonymous Stacey Yousif said...

Hello. I just wanted to give a quick greeting and tell you I enjoyed reading your material.

10:29 AM, January 10, 2006  

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