My Tax Dollars At Work

via Ace, a wonderful list of what your stimulus dollars hath wrought. Some of my favorites:

$300,000 for a GPS-equipped helicopter to hunt for radioactive rabbit droppings at the Hanford nuclear reservation in Washington state.

I used to live around there. It is bare and flat. No trees. A $200 GPS handheld and some minimum-wage teenagers with Geiger counters would do the trick, and how often do you need to do a lagomorph-generated alpha particle count? (To be fair, if these are *giant* radioactive rabbits the helicopter might be prudent.)

$11 million for Microsoft to build a bridge connecting its two headquarter campuses in Redmond, Wash., which are separated by a highway.

Because Microsoft is famous for not having any money.

$219,000 for Syracuse University to study the sex lives of freshmen women.

They have sex lives, you don't. Gimmee the money.

$6 million for a snow-making facility in Duluth, Minn.

You have GOT to be kidding me. Is this for all the poor urban kids of Duluth who would otherwise never experience the joy of throwing a snowball?

$380,000 to spay and neuter pets in Wichita, Kan.

Why don't they just spay and neuter the students at Syracuse University?

$462,000 to purchase 22 concrete toilets for use in the Mark Twain National Forest in Missouri

Oh how I wish Mark Twain hisself could comment on this chuckleheaded notion. He'd probably offer to dig the latrines for half the price. Complete with whitewashed "privacy fence".

Proxmire's Golden Fleece awards ride again ...